this narrow path

1 john 5:14-15


¹⁴ This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. ¹⁵ And if we know that he hears us—whatever we ask—we know that we have what we asked of him.


i'm at this stage again-- i'm praying, but idk if this is what God wants for me. right now, i feel like there are soo many opportunities laid out in front of me. it's just a matter of seizing the right path--God's path for me. "if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.".. so now my question is what is HIs will for me? it's something that i come back to once in a while when i'm trying to make important decisions.. for me, it's an internal battle as to either being there for a group of people, or to take time to further my faith and for myself to grow and experience as an individual. the few years that i'm in college, is the most freedom i'm gonna ever have. and to be honest, i feel like i haven't used them to my advantage. is that selfish of me to want something for ME for a change.. mm again, it all boils down to what God wants for me. for all i know, my thoughts and internal battles may just be another pointless phase that i'm putting myself through.




If I find in myself desires nothing in this world can satisfy,
I can only conclude that I was not made for here
If the flesh that I fight is at best only light and momentary,
then of course I'll feel nude when to where I'm destined I'm compared

Speak to me in the light of the dawn
Mercy comes with the morning
I will sigh and with all creation groan as I wait for hope to come for me

Am I lost or just less found? On the straight or on the roundabout of the wrong way?
is this a soul that stirs in me, is it breaking free, wanting to come alive?
Cos my comfort would prefer for me to be numb
And avoid the impending birth of who I was born to become

-C.S. Lewis Song - Brooke Fraser