LORD, take this away from me.

phillipians 2

i don't know what to do.

after this retreat weekend, i somehow have more of a desire to love others like Christ loves us. the only thing holding me back... is my christian pride.

this weeknd, i learned that i'm not in this alone... others feel the same way i do. of course they're gonna feel the same way i do.. how can we not? even though we're christian, we're human tooo and our sins are as low as nonchristians' sins.

yes, i acknowledge this. and i wanna change it. and for the very first time,, i talked to God about it. i talked to pastor adam about it and i also talked to my small group about it at the retreat. pastor adam told me to persevere,,, and to look and reflect on phillipians 2. one of the older, wiser people from cornerstone told me about his experience with pride and how it took him five years of perseverence and prayer, until recently, God took away his pride by humiliating him and allowing him to go throw something that humbled his heart.

i selfishly want to be like Christ. and i selfishly want God to smile at me with every word that comes out of my mouth, and with every thought that crosses my mind, and with every action that i take.