it's just the start =)

so before i start my qt, i have a confession to make. i really suck when it comes to committing myself to doing daily quiet times. i've always tried and tried, but failed. so i thought that if i stepped to serve the church, i could sorta use this to my advantage to get to know the bible a little more..

so for the past couple days, i've been debating where i wanna start from the bible. there are so many interesting stories.. but where to starT??? seriously. anyway.. i'm still trying to sort that out.. so until i figure that out, i'm gonna sorta jump around.

for today, i'm gonna talk about what Jesus said about prayer.

Matthew 6:5-8
5. and when you pray, do not be like the hypocrites, for they love to pray standing in the synagogues and on the street corners to be seen by men. I tell you the truth, they have recieved their reward in full 6. but when you pray, go into your room, close the door and pray to your Father, who is unseen. Then your Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you 7. And when you pray, do not keep babbling like pagans, for they think they will be heard becuase of their many words 8. do not be like them, for your Father knows what you need before you ask him.

and then He goes on instructing us to pray with the Lord's prayer in the later verses.

so for those who go to church regularly.. you've probably heard this passage.

praying has always been sorta difficult for me. most times, i feel like one of those hyprocrites that Jesus mentions in verse 5. words, but no meaning. praying with empty words when you're surrounded by people in order to show off. you think that after 19 years of church surroundings, it shouldn't be a problem? but honestly, it gets to the point where sometimes, my prayers just consist of asking, "Father, help me with my prayers." the end.. but then, He also instructs us to go into a quiet place and pray. when i do that, i have a hard time focusing.. there are so many thoughts that run through my head that words won't come out and i start repeating stuff i've already said to Him.. once that happens, i'm back to square one: being a hypocrite.

it's easy to run to GOd when i'm in desperate need of something.. the hardest part is trying to spend time with GOd when your life is stress-free. it's like that saying.. "praise GOd when you're happy and praise God when you're down." (not exactly that.. but something like that.) and that's what i'm trying to work on.. not just spending time with Him because i need help with life, but because i'm content with life. up until now, my prayers have come from my needs and wants. i feel like if i can spend time with HIm during my happy days, that's when i'll stop being a hypocrite and that's when the words coming out of my mouth will be prayers <3